Anticipation

I realized that Soren's been getting all the attention on here lately, even as I started my last entry talking about getting ready for the next baby. The second pregnancy sure is a whole different experience than the first. Some of those differences come because everything's not new or strange anymore. I understand a bit better what my body and I are going through (although I sure seem to have forgotten a lot in two years, as well). But my focus is a lot different now, too. Instead of using all my spare time to think about or plan for this new little baby, I find I have no spare time! Not exactly true, but I have a whole lot less and so things keep getting pushed aside for another time.

I'm pretty sure we had a name at this point with the last baby. We're not even close (unless Erich finally gives in to my innumerable excellent suggestions). The nursery-to-be is still full of office furniture and men's clothes in the closet. The plus side is that we have the furniture and bedding - it's just in use by a big brother at the moment. With all the other things going on -- finishing stuff on the kitchen remodel, getting the yard ready for fall/winter (when you miss most of the summer it takes a lot to catch up!) and keeping up with an active toddler -- we find ourselves drained of energy and resources and time to prepare for this little one.

Yet despite these limitations, it is with great anticipation that I await the arrival of our little boy. He is being knit together in the last few months to be a unique and special addition to our family. Though we do not yet know his name, God does and always has. God knows the number of hairs on his head, his eye color and his personality. And I think each day about the future moments when I will discover these same things about our second son. His life is also a gift to us and I am reminded of that each time I feel this little boy move within me, whether it's a kick to the ribs or a gentle rolling that makes my whole stomach move.

While some of the physical preparations for this baby may be lacking, in my heart I am busily preparing a place that this little boy has already begun to occupy. I know in a more personal way what we will experience upon the arrival of this baby; not just the sleep deprivation and shift in responsibilities, but also the love and joy, the quiet, tender moments we will experience and the overwhelming emotions that come with raising a child. In those ways, I am even more ready than before to welcome this little boy, waiting in great anticipation.