A Little Bit Different

This year Soren turned three and we decided to do our first "friend party" to celebrate. But the idea of keeping up with the Jones' to in the party department was overwhelming to me, especially at this age. So we did a "play date" instead. Even that was hard, because as I listed the friends Soren has, there were more than 10 -- what I thought would be a ridiculous number of toddlers to have for a 3rd birthday. So we choose a small list for our playdate and kept it to a couple hours with a simple autumn craft the kids took home and some cupcakes.

Soren had a great time and I wasn't stressed about it. And also important to me: we didn't break the bank. We have chosen to do things a little bit different. Also this weekend, Soren was invited to another 3 year-old party. I wasn't there, but he had an awesome time and came home with a terrific favor bag. The party had a theme with adorable handmade invites, themed treats, and more. It was the kind of party I've seen lots of friends put on. I've seen an amazing carnival party. A campout party. And just saw a little girl's Alice In Wonderland tea party with amazing decorations, themed food, Queen of Hearts croquet. I have an acquaintance who performs at princess parties. I look on with jealous admiration for these parties; the craftiness, the creativity and the energy that people put in to the birthday parties. I'd love to be a kid at one of these birthday parties.

But I know my limits, and while I love hosting and having an open home, we have chosen to do things a little differently. We know our limits financially, physically and creatively. We have chosen to teach our kids contentment and use their birthdays as part of that. We still want birthdays to be fun and we want kids to have a great time. We have made an intentional decision to focus our energy on enjoying the celebration rather than stressing about the details, and this first effort was, we think, fun for all. Even me.

Naughty

Sometimes, a three-year-old is naughty. Sometimes, naughty is frustrating, stressful, and makes a parent angry and ready to pull hair out. But sometimes, naughty takes pressing your lips together to keep from smiling and laughing because naughty is funny and cute, shows off their smarts or their sense of humor.

I've been teaching about naughty and how it's a "wrong thing" and how wrong things can hurt or make other people sad. We talk about making God sad when we do wrong things. But today I wondered, if sometimes it's hard for me not to laugh at naughty, does God sometimes just want to laugh when we're naughty?

I Don't Have Boys

Last week I dropped my little big guy at a friend's house with her daughter of the same age. This was the first time I'd dropped him off for a play date without me, because I was taking the babe to an appointment. When I returned about an hour later I was greeted at the door with a huge, "Whew!" My heart sank to my stomach thinking something had gone wrong. Her response was, "No problems. I don't have boys!"

It was so funny to think about that. Other people who have older girls have commented to me about how different it is to play with my two boys. So this has had me thinking how differently my boys play. It has highlighted their energy, the "wildness" of their play. Today, while the boys were running and screaming and climbing all over me, I remembered what my friend said. When we had some kids over and kids were jumping on the bed, I was the only mom who didn't really care. I would have never believed it of myself, but I let my boys jump on the bed (but only the bed). My boys take out just about every toy every day, and the mess stays there until the end of the day (it's not worth my energy to pick up multiple times or battle putting one toy away before the next one.

There is pounding, banging, running and crazy chaos every day. My three year old is rough and tumble, he is active and noisy; I'm sure little brother will follow in those footsteps. But we also have wonderful quiet moments in between when we read and cuddle, do puzzles and color. I'm tired every night, but I love the energy, I love the pure joy. I love my rough tumble boys, whether the moment is calm or or loud and crazy.

As a world mourned

Within days of the news of Steve Jobs' death, I heard two people reflect on his memorable commencement speech at Stanford. I was intrigued by the portion that was referenced and it challenged my thinking. Both of these people referenced the same portion of his speech, although they focused on different aspects and were portraying it in different lights (one positive, one slightly negative).

I am no techy and I use very few of the products that Steve Jobs has created, but I have great respect for his intellect and innovations in technology. But I was struck by an untruth in this famous speech that can easily be glossed over because it can seem so obviously true. Even though both people I heard are followers of Christ, neither one of them pointed out what to me was the most obvious thing to point out. Below is the portion of the speech given by Jobs:

"No one wants to die. Even people who want to go to heaven don't want to die to get there. And yet death is the destination we all share. No one has ever escaped it. And that is as it should be, because death is very likely the single best invention of life. It is life's change agent. It clears out the old to make way for the new. Right now the new is you, but some day not too long from now, you will gradually become the old and be cleared away. Sorry to be so dramatic, but it is quite true.

"Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life. Don't be trapped by dogma – which is living with the results of other people's thinking. Don't let the noise of others' opinions drown out your own inner voice. And, most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary."

The first time I heard about the speech, the guy was reflecting on the second paragraph and focusing on the challenge of living our own life, not someone else's -- a positive message in a society that often pressures us to pursue specific priorities and definitions of success.

The next reflection I heard pointed out the error in thinking that our inner voice, heart and mind can lead us separate from the Truth of God. This is an error wide-spread in our world today.

But still, once significant untruth has been missed. While Steve's words are poignant and powerful, he gets one thing very wrong when speaking of death, for he says, "no one has ever escaped it." But the fact is, One person HAS escaped death, Jesus of Nazareth. Jesus died a horrible death, but then He was raised up by the power of God and He ascended to heaven very much alive.

Jesus Christ is the one human who has experienced victory over death and that means everything. It means we can have a relationship with a living God, not a dead one. It means God has power over the one thing that seems so very powerful to us, and it means that not only is my death transformed, but my living -- it is because of Jesus that I can live out the challenge of Steve Jobs' speech, to not waste my life trying to live someone else's life, but the life God created me to live.